i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
