The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
