i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
too bad you live with your parents still
you traded sex for a burrito?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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