Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
