Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
