Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
