I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Just high enough for therapy.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
