You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I'm just crazy horny about you
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize