So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
