i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
