Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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