dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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