His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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