Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
