I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
two words...techno handjob
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
