so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize