I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
