Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Randomize
