Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
