I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
