she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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