I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize