I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
