How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize