I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
