I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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