well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
