hell yes lets make some ravioli
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
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