Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
