I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
me + whiskey = a bad person
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize