Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize
