Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize