i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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