You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
