then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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