This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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