you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
