i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
