I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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