I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
