i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize