Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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