what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize