dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
