you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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