Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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