Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
