So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize