You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize