Fuck appropriateness.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
