so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
