I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
